Back in March Matthew kicked me in the chest while we attempted to restrain him. It was not intentional, but I havent been the same since.  First it was chest pain, which was a trip to the ER and a diagnosis of no broken bones, but a bruised chest wall.  Then I got sick and went to see my PCP Dr M. She put me on antibiotics and said I must have aspirated when he kicked me. I had pneumonia. Nasal sprays, antibiotics, pain killers and more. I was miserable. And it hurt to breathe. I spent Easter in bed, sicker than I had been with the Spinal Headache in October.

A second trip to the Er over the weekend led me to get pain meds that I had not asked for, but for the first time I was not in total pain. For the first time I could relax and breathe. I cried. I bawled. I had not felt that comfortable in 3 + years. Dilaudid.  The Dr took more Xrays and said the pneumonia was clearing up and I had more of an URI at the time and my chest wall was still pretty bruised up.  He told me I needed to talk with my PCP about the pain meds and the mixture I was on then. I was taking a lot of medications. I will write them all down here.

Vicoprofen  One every 6 hours. PCP perscribed.

Tramadol HCL. 50mg 2 tabs twice daily. Pain Specialist Perscribed.

Fiorcet Tabs 50/325/50. 1 every 4 to 6 hours for pain as needed. PCP Perscribed for migraines.

Inderall LA 60mg ER. Neurologist Perscribed for migraine pervention.

Tylenol 4 300/60. 1 tab every 4 hours. PCP perscibed.

Cataflam 50mg. 1 tablet 3 times daily. Pain Specialist Perscribed.

Zanaflex 4mg. 1 tab twice daily. Pain specialist perscribed.

Dalmane 30mg cap. 1 tab at bedtime. PCP Perscibed.

Flexeril 10mg. 1 tab at bedtime, had been reduced from 3xs daily. PCP Perscibed.

Flextor Patch 1.3%. 2 patches daily for 12 hours. Pain Specialist Prescribed.

Pepcid AC- OTC for heartburn and stomach issues from all the medications.

——————————– As of April 2008——————–

I had a follow up apt with my PCP and I rediscussed my concerns of all the medications I was taking, the fact that what I was on was not controlling the pain, and the only relief I got was when I was sedated. I was seeing a chiropractor this entire time as well, twice a week when I was well enough, and a massage therapist. I had also started Physical Therapy up until I had some personal female issues which led to a DNC and a biopsy. The biopsy was clean.  I had told her that the Dilaudid was given to me in the Er and I had wonderful relief from the pain. She was concerned it was a strong medication and explained it was used at the end of ones life. I asked her if there was a middle of the road med, something stronger than what I was on, but not 12 different medications. I was concerned of overdosing, dying or something. 12 medications at night was more than any one person who is internally organ wise healthy should be taking.

My PCP put me on Dilaudid. She walked in with a script, we traded in what I had been taking for the most part and started off on 2mg every 6 hours. I found that with the Dilaudid I could function and only needed to take it 2 to 3 times a day. I was getting back to life.

I saw her in 2 weeks and things were going well. I had one of my best days in 7 months. I walked down 3 flights of stairs. I restarted Physical therapy. My Chiropractor and I discussed this as a door that was given to us and we were going to run through it together.  And then I got hit with pain.

ON Wednesday I felt a pop in my left neck side. I called and made an apt with the Chiropractor on Thursday. I dislocated a rib. He was able to manipulate it back into place, with tears rolling down my face. I could barely breath. I knew things had changed, I was just not sure how much.

I got copies of all of my scans to discover they never did an MRI of my neck. I saw the Chiropractor again on Friday morning, and then had a full hour massage that afternoon. I couldnt stand up. If I looked up, I had sharp pains in my neck. if I looked left and up I would get dizzy and pass out. Things were horrible. Pain was out of control. I was going down hill fast.

That evening I went to my mothers and crashed on her couch. My husband called the paramedics and they took me by ambulance to the hospital.  I had a migraine which was worrisome since I couldn’t move my neck without pain. CT Scans, MRIs, Xrays, Bloodwork and pain meds. I was admitted.

The next 48 hours seem to be a blur. It was a 430am MRI, which I was on Valium for as well as the Dilaudid IV, and a hop off the table led me to hurt my left ankle. Still unsure of what I did to it, but they should not have had me walking on those medications.  I recieved shots in my left side of my neck muscles, and I am still unsure of what it was for. And medications were moved around.

As of this point I am seeing a new Pain specialist. Dr K. I am going to be forward and say her bedside manner sucks. She yells at you for being in pain. Shes very straight forward. She said I carry my stress in my shoulders, but then is upset that I was crying because I was told that my cat, My Lexi, who was older than dirt, passed away while I was in the hospital. I mean damn, I didnt get to say goodbye.  While all this is going on I am being stressed out. Im in horrific pain, I dont know whats wrong with me, but more tests, more ct scans, more xrays.

And then I am discharged. We dont know why. We dont know under whos authority. We just dont know. We did not even have test results back.

So currently I am on Fentanyl Patch 25mcg/hr. Dilaudid 2mg every 6 hours. Flexeril 10mg 3xday. Inderall 60mg daily, Previcid 30mg, Dalmane, Firocet as needed for the migraines. I also have lidocane patches for my chest and neck, but I dont know if that does anything.  Shorter list.

I see the Chiropractor on Mondays and Fridays. I see Physical Therapist on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. I have a stimulation machine at home for my lower back, and I am put in traction for my neck 4 times a week.

What is wrong with me? I still dont know. Something about my C3 and C4 in my neck. Other issues too. Ill pull the paperwork and put it all down here, but I wanted to get this out tonight before I go to bed.

This is where it starts. The pains in the middle of my head, behind my eyes that make me fall to the bed. Hold my head tight, cry tears and want to die. Those pains the meds dont touch, and when I asked what I should do, I was told ” take Extra strenght tylenol.” ROFL… Um ya, because you already have me on what.. the strongest medications in the fucking WORLD???!! Hows about we find out why my head is killing me?/ Wouldnt that be a bright idea?

OK enough.. stress… bed. I am due for meds and bedtime.